Wait! I forgot to tell you…
My 13-year-old daughter is amazing. And she’s also 13. Which means the bouncy silly girl with unbridled joy of a golden Labrador has been replaced with a cat. If our questions aren’t interesting enough, she gives us a shrug and a ‘hmm.’ When we try to keep up with the latest ‘tea’ at school, more often than not, we get a ‘I don’t know.’
On the flip side, our 10-year-old is still in the golden Labrador phase. She wants to tell us everything. Everything is exciting. She’s dying to talk to us.
Now, before I get into my ‘ah ha’ moment with my 13-year-old, here’s a little about our family. Our family likes to play games while we are waiting in line, for food at a restaurant, in the car, etc. My husband and I try very hard not to scroll on our phones during down time with our kids, and at 10 and 13 neither of our girls have a phone yet. So, we play categories, wandering drawing, would you rather, and we do pull out the phone for wordle and connections.
These silly moments are amazing and have turned 15 minutes of small talk into inside jokes that we bring up every time we play. Like during a game of categories when my husband, Sam, tried to convince us that the Uuru was in fact a real animal. It has the fur of a zebra, height of a giraffe, and only speaks Portuguese.
My ‘ah ha’ moment happened on a day when we were all together running errands. Sam and I were unsuccessfully making small talk with the girls, when our 10 y/o got bored and asked if we could play a game. Sam and I always say ‘yes’ to games because we know that’s our in with the girls.
While it’s been years since our 13 y/o has asked to play a game, she always plays. And I think this is important. We have to remember that everyone still wants to be a kid. More importantly, all humans want to connect. 13-year-olds feel awkward and don’t know how much or what to share. Playing games is a way to get talking. And once the dam breaks, the conversation starts flowing, you get all of the random stories of the day. You get the ‘wait! I forgot to tell you about..’
So, the next time you’re bored with your kids, challenge them to a game of rock, paper, scissors, see if you still have the quick reflexes for Slap Jack, and if you need a little inspiration check out Wanderwing.
